Goodness gracious, I caught on fire.

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Despite my sin and the error of my ways, the Lord has been making the presence of His Holy Spirit known during worship for me.  I have been asking God to push my faith to the next level, to draw me closer to Himself and to increase my spiritual gifting.  Of course, He answers these prayers but the spiritual forces of darkness exist to destroy our hearts to prevent us from practicing these gifts or living in obedience to the King.  I have seen this battle intensify in my life more recently.  With each failure and victory, I thank the Lord for His mercy and grace, answering prayers that teach me how to be a better man.

We sang "Fire, Fall Down" during worship on Sunday evening.  I have always prayed that the Holy Spirit would unleash fire from heaven and consume His people with an overwhelming passion for His glory.  I believed that fire would cause revival and renewal, that this fire would encourage us to live life with boundless faith.  As I prayed that God's fire would fall down, the Lord presented to my heart what fire falling from heaven would actually mean for me.  He presented the image of me being alone in a room with all the people and things that I value.  The room was so crowded, filled with people and things that I have used to fill space in my heart. In fact, I could not really see beyond what was next to me.  Suddenly, everything was gone and the room was on fire, beams from the top of the ceiling falling.  In the front of the room was a man, clothed all in white and surrounded by bright light.  He walked towards me and then stopped, looking at me as if He were gazing into my heart.  All of this took about fifteen seconds and it was suddenly over.

Fire had consumed everything that stood in the way of me seeing Jesus.  Fire destroyed all things in my heart that shared a room with Christ, that tried to rent a room when it was already occupied by the Holy Spirit.  I could almost sense a challenge.  "Do you really want My fire to fall down?"  I did not have much of a response, but to remain quiet and worship Him.  The fire wasn't going to be sent to get people emotionally excited about worship.  If fire fell down, it would consume every Tower of Babel that we have built in our lives.  I remembered that God is a God of wrath and that He mollifies His own wrath with His love for us.  Moments like those remind me of Jesus' sacrifice and its significance in our standing before God.  I wonder if we really want His fire to fall or if we just like the intensity of the lyrics.

I do not write this because I think Jesus wants to destroy everything in our lives, but to have everything in our lives utilized to give Him glory.  Jesus is to be the center of our existence and the reason that we live.  Through Him, all things were made.  And when we seek Him first, all things are added onto us.  There is reason why the entire universe revolves around the sun and that the sun is a bright ball of fire.  If we do not revolve around the Son, then all might be consumed by his fire.  True story.